Not sure what I’ve been waiting for with updating… I think I’ve been waiting for something to settle into some kind of rhythm, like equalize to some place but it’s kinda been a moving target. \u00a0I still find I’m not believing that Hodgkin’s isn’t coming back. \u00a0I find myself saying things like, “I don’t feel bad… yet…” when talking about how January of the last two years I was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s and my next scan was in January and whatnot… I don’t know… I think it’s kinda telling that that’s what came out of my mouth without thinking about it.<\/p>\n
The highest point in the last few months was when a buddy of mine called me to see if I’d be interested in a job in San Francisco and to get him a resume right away. \u00a0Was psyched and energized and called and got my appointments in order and whatnot. \u00a0The lowest was probably the following day, I felt foolish and dumb for believing it could happen. \u00a0I don’t really believe in luck, but if anyone has bad luck it’s me. \u00a0The day after that I was doing alright, by the time I found out a week later or so that they were pushing the job I would be doing off until 2011, it was disappointing but I had already been at a low point, so it was a hit but not a huge hit. \u00a0This was in Oct.<\/p>\n
Most of the time the last few month has been variable but not nearly to either extreme. \u00a0I think I was kinda just waiting for something to happen and hoping it wouldn’t. \u00a0If I just sat around and did nothing, if nothing changed, shit would stay the same and Hodgkin’s wouldn’t come back. \u00a0As illogical as that is, yay subconscious?<\/p>\n
Late last month I spent two weeks with the buddy I visited a few months ago (from the post below). I had a good time, pretty sure he did too (heh). \u00a0It’s the first time I’d been away from home for more than a week in at least 6 years, maybe more. \u00a0I was talking to a buddy of mine before leaving that lives in Seattle and ask if he still had a room for rent. \u00a0I thought he didn’t, ’cause he said he had them rented but he said one fell through so he still had a room. \u00a0He said he needed the money so I’d have to pay rent but I didn’t have to wait for a job at Microsoft, I could just find whatever for now and work towards MS or whatever while I’m there. \u00a0As I was at my buddies in KC, I kept mulling that over. \u00a0As time passed it seemed like a better and better idea to the point of basically deciding that’s what I’m going to do. \u00a0Then I got home and even on the first night felt the draw and comfort of staying where I am. \u00a0But I was away long enough that I had already made up my mind and I knew how I was feeling was bullshit, so I held on to how I’d felt before knowing that was legit. \u00a0I’m not good at getting things done that have no deadline, things that can be indefinitely put off into a vague future time. \u00a0In contrast, if something is in my face and needs to get done, I’m good about doing it. \u00a0If I stay here I could easily see myself putting off taking the next step, staying at the job I had and living at home and basically kinda just sitting around waiting to get cancer again. \u00a0So basically what the above paragraph boils down to is that if I’m clear after my next scan in mid January, I’m moving to Seattle.<\/p>\n
Well, that’s not entirely true. \u00a0The company in SF decided to proceed with the project and I’m still in the running for it and it’s gone further this time around. \u00a0I talked to the recruiter directly and talked to the consulting company I’d be working through, so now we’re just waiting the word from the actually company. \u00a0So I guess either way I’ll be moving west, but where exactly is still up in the air. \u00a0I’ll probably end up in Seattle either way, since even if I get it, it’s just a 6 month contract in SF.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Not sure what I’ve been waiting for with updating… I think I’ve been waiting for something to settle into some kind of rhythm, like equalize to some place but it’s kinda been a moving target. \u00a0I still find I’m not believing that Hodgkin’s isn’t coming back. \u00a0I find myself saying things like, “I don’t feel […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_s2mail":"yes","spay_email":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-420","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-hodgkins-lymphoma"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pqH02-6M","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/blog.mrblob9000.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/420","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/blog.mrblob9000.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/blog.mrblob9000.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blog.mrblob9000.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blog.mrblob9000.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=420"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/blog.mrblob9000.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/420\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":423,"href":"http:\/\/blog.mrblob9000.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/420\/revisions\/423"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/blog.mrblob9000.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=420"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blog.mrblob9000.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=420"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blog.mrblob9000.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=420"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}